‘New surroundings’ is one way to put it

(August 18) - You’ve got to love Canada Post. I did, for a couple of weeks a couple of weeks ago.

My brothers and I lost our father on July 24. We didn’t really lose him. None of us are that careless. We know exactly where he is. The last any of us saw of him he was being lowered into the ground in Stratford’s Avondale Cemetery.

A few days later, my brother Ron and I were doing some of the things we need to do to start wrapping up his affairs. I was expecting some bills and other documents, so I stopped in at a post office in Stratford to change his mail over to my house. I was ready to pay the sixty-something dollars normally charged for this service. No need, I found.

It can be done for nothing in the case of a deceased person. All I needed was a copy of the death certificate, which I didn’t have at the time. No worries, I thought. No rush, Ron said.

A week or so later I stopped in at the downtown Guelph postal outlet, death certificate at the ready. Thanks for this, they said, but we need more documentation. I thought they asked for a copy of the power of attorney, so I went home and got it. Thanks for this, they said, but we need a copy of the will to prove you are a legitimate executioner. So I went back home and got it. To be safe, I also got everything else I could put my hands on and carry in one briefcase.

Thanks for this, they said. That’s all we need. Sure enough, any and all mail sent to him in Stratford soon started arriving at my door in Guelph. His final Bell bill arrived. Other mail did as well.

Then last Thursday I got home from work and checked the mail. There was a package wrapped in clear plastic, addressed to Charles James Pickersgill at my home address.

The contents say, on one side, “Welcome to your new home.”

Flip it over and you find that it’s a little Canada Post magazine called, in the modern way, smartmoves. The cover story promises to tell my dad “How to get comfortable in your new surroundings.”

I don’t think I’ll ever cut open the plastic wrap. I’ll keep it for him. If he could ever see it, he would have a great laugh.

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Then there’s Rogers. You don’t have to love them. Cable and satellite TV companies have been told to make a $60 million payment to a local programming improvement fund. It is supposed to help the independent Canadian companies that will suffer when everything goes digital next year.

When it made this ruling last October, the CRTC said “The increased contribution represents a monthly average of 50 cents per subscriber. Given the health of the broadcasting distribution industry and the new revenue streams provided by the policies announced today, the CRTC does not expect companies to pass this cost along to their subscribers.”

Last week we got the word from Rogers that our bill would go up to cover the levy they weren’t supposed to pass on to us. Bell is doing the same to its satellite customers.

If you want to let the broadcast regulator know what you think of this, go to crtc. gc.ca and click on the link to making a complaint.

Rogers and Bell already charge the world’s highest prices for cell phone use. They can’t be too far away from the same position in television distribution. They call it service. I call it greed. Either way, we are getting Rogered.